Sunday, September 28, 2008

Dog Bloat

well since Amanda has been really going for the table food, alot of it ends up on the floor. Luckily we have 3 dogs and there is always one handy for cleanup. Mona, the chihuahua, is in the house most of the time and she's closest to the floor so she's the best cleaner. (Dixie tends to do that stupid dog thing where when you point at the food she looks at your finger...) Mona is usually curled up on a pile of blankets behind the couch and with all the chaos in the house lately, we really haven't taken much time to really look at Mona. But last night I looked at her and absolutely had to do a double take, then I had to check that I was awake. Mona is not normally a skinny dog. She's a large breed of chihuahua and weighs in at about 11 or 12 lbs. I swear to you in the last week or maaaybe 2 weeks she must have gained 3 lbs! She was positively rotund!! She was bloated! she waddled!! I felt so bad! I think she must have gone out to poop 6 times last night and today she seems a bit more herself. When she fell asleep on the ottoman last night, I noticed she was sort of quietly moaning on the exhale...she had that like Thanksgiving belly ache thing. Poor Monie!! Anyway, she's on a diet now. And no more table scraps for her. We called in Dixie for clean up tonight...she's much better suited for the variety of foods anyway. She's a total garbage disposal...she actually ate cloth once and we were soooo worried that she'd end up having to have surgery. But nope. It just came out the other end. It was good prepraration for motherhood actually...I had to go in the yard and look in her poop to check for the passage of all the pieces of cloth. I could just imagine a piece staying in there and getting infected...ugh. So yes, I actually retrieved all the pieces to put the cloth puzzle together and only then did I rest easy.
(Not that you have to sort thru your kids poop or anything but you have to get pretty comfortable with bodily functions in motherhood, poop being the very least. Ever catch vomit in your hand? yeah.)

Then a couple years ago, she and Travis both ate an entire tray of brownie bites that I got from the store for a party we were having. Brownies. Now I know we all know chocolate is bad for dogs. But an M&M or 2 is far different from a plate full of brownies! Most candy contains very little actual cocoa. It is my understanding that its the theobromine in cocoa that is toxic. Well of all the dessert recipes, only a few use an amount of cocoa that is significant...brownies being one of them! So I got on the internet and obsessively searched what a toxic level of theobromine would be for a dog of her weight, and approximately how much cocoa/theobromine would be in a plate of brownies...I crunched imaginary numbers all night.

The damn dogs didn't do more than make a poopy mess on the lawn, thank God. She is made of iron, that dog. Travis fared worse than she did but they were both lucky. And now that I know her behavior around Travis better than I did back then, I am pretty sure Travis probably only got a sniff and a couple licks of brownie before Dixie greedily inhaled all of them herself. Further proof of how tough she is.

Her food stealing ways go way back to the first week we had her when she stole our filet mignons off the counter where they were defrosting. I found them in the backyard and she had just kind of chewed the juice out of them and left them on the grass. I was sickened to see a good cut of beef just be wasted that way so I scooped up the steaks, cooked them, ground them up and fed them to her properly.

Friggin dogs.

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