Monday, November 23, 2009

THE BOOK, damnit.


We all know I should write a book. we've all known this for some time. I always thought it would be some great work of fiction, or some pithy dramatic story about how God has affected my life the last few years. But as it turns out Adult ADD (or whatever you want to label me with...whaever i can take it) and fleshing out complex characters and plots and writing deeply personal things don't work well together.

so my friend, (you know who you are) said, "Well what about an Erma Bombeck kinda vibe. She's dead ya know. There's a spot in the market..."

friggin brilliant really. I could take all my little short musings from here and Facebook and compile a book of witticisms and pithy, funny, quippy crap. Like Jenny McCarthy meets Erma Bombeck and they ride the Sarcastic Express to the Yellow Brick Road...

So listen...would you people actually buy, and read, and enjoy reading such a thing? What if it turns out to be kind of my life story only with funny crap here and there and things I've learned along the way? I have a hard time believing that anyone would want to read such a thing.

Make a freakin comment. I'm manic and I'm writing a book and I'm writing it now and you people better get on board and help me!

I need a name (working title is "Kelly's Quippy Crap" so we'll need a real title.) I need a format. I need to know if it has to be all funny. I need you people to help me decide what isnt' funny or included. And then we have to figure out if I should publish it myself or find a publisher. and then you all have to buy it cuz there's no free copies damnit. I'm unemployed. (But I will sign it with my signature happy face).

comment. now. damnit.


(I feel like I just "came out" or something... hold me)


  1. Well, I personally think you are a laugh riot. Even when you're mad you're funny. I will buy it! I read your blog all the time.

    You should include lots of the stuff from your blog. The kid stuff is a riot and let's face it..most women can relate.

    love ya

  2. P.S. and after you write it just submit it to every single publisher that exists.


    Omfg write the book.

    I don't always comment, cos I read in reader, but shit me Kelly, WRITE THE BOOK.

    Omg will you mention me if you write the book?

    Oh shit I'm totally gonna brag about you to people if you write the book.

    "We shared baby details! We met online and have Karma Kids! She totally knew me once!!"

    You need to write the book. And no, it doesn't all have to be funny. Everything is just as important. Write. The. Book.

  4. PS ...did I mention you should seriously write the book?

  5. Write it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Fo Sho!

    But please don't put "crap" in the title--I don't want to buy a book with "crap" in the title. :0) Surely Mr. Evans can help you come up with a more witty, appropriate title! ha!

    So, recap: WRITE THE BOOK!!

    I will buy it and am even willing to pre-order if you need encouragement!
    love you much and can't wait to read it!