The Soapbox Diva

Ok, I am not going to get up on this soapbox without disclaiming that I am not perfect. I commit comma splicing crimes. I'm not sure what a dangling participle is. I'm not sure about predicates and all that crap. I didn't pay attention to grammar lessons because I was much more interested in literature; and grammar as well as spelling, frankly, came naturally to me. My Papa's genes gave me an innate sense of language. I'm not perfect. However, my skin crawls when certain egregious crimes of English are committed. Let's discuss this, shall we. PEOPLE! There is NO "M" in the word VOLUPTUOUS...meaning curvy, shapely, rubinesque...trust me...I know a thing or 2 about voluptuousness. there is NO "M" IN THAT WORD!! It is NOT volumptuous. Gawd that makes me want go screaming down the street every time someone says that. Also, if you are trying to give someone the verbal finger, the phrase is "I could not care less", NOT "I could ca...

grammatical pet peeves, a reiteration So I bought new shampoo. Finesse. 2 in 1. (does anyone else find it ironic that I am complaining about bad grammar and using incomplete sentences? Yeah well I like ee cummings so bite me.) aaaaanyway, it says on the bottle: "For softer, more shiny hair." I tilted my head like a dog who heard someone do one of those whistle-y farts that no one else in the room either hears or acknowledges, or they think it was the chair or the screen door or something. I read it again. "For softer, more shiny hair" well the problem is this: it SHOULD say "For softer, shinier hair" aaaaaaah!!!! so then after I ranted about this, my husband and I argued about it. I researched it. What is the rule exactly? well there is a rule, more or less (you know how the english language is), which states that if a word is 2 syllables or less, it gets "er...